Since I can remember I have spent my halloween nights in the least amount of clothing legally possible (sorry mom); from pasty bra hula-girl, to homemade leotard Robin, halloween is one of my faves. I basically start planning Nov 1st.
This year, my wife Laura and I (no she’s not my ‘partner’ we both like men) decided since we weren’t going to be able to celebrate halloween like we used to in our classy ASU days, we would spend our day in the kitchen making amaze recipes and gaining as much weight as possible–no need to be skinny if you’re not dressing as a skank.
So here goes Halo-fest 2011.BOO!
RECIPE 1: Bat Bites
The ball part is a cream-cheese pesto dip. To cover the outside I suggest NOT covering them in pepper unless you want to die. Get blue chips and crush them in a big ziploc bag instead.
RECIPE 2:Chocolate chip pumpkin banana bread HEAVEN
We even made the frosting because its basically the easiest baking trick I have ever learned. Make sure you time this little baby perfect and put it in the MIDDLE rack, or you will end up with a soggy loaf even the dog wont eat.
RECIPE 3: Bloody Vertebrae. I can’t find the recipe for this one so I’ll wing it
Basically you get big tortillas used for wraps
spread garlic cream-cheese on the entire tortilla
place salame, provolone, and spinach
Next, you roll that bitch. Take the end and wrap it like wrapping paper when you’re putting it away (best way to describe it) and make sure its tightttttt. Then take plastic wrap and wrap it even tighter, let sit in the fridge for 40 min.
Take it out cut it and if you’re ocd and cut perfect pieces, you can stack them on top of each other to make it look like a spine. Lastly, you take siracha, of coarse, and drizzle it all over to make it look like blood.
And that mis amigos is Halo-fest 2011. An entire day spent drinking wine and cooking, now thats bliss.
xxo
There is a certain criteria one must make when selecting a soul mate. My list is very simple: love animals, love calling people out,be funny yet unpredictable and have an intense obsession with food/cooking.
Just when I least expected, Chrissy Teigen came along. Forget she is illegally gorgeous, read her blog and you will die of love, if you don’t consider yourself dead to me.FOREVER.
oh yea she replied to my tweet and I cried…
“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”
Steve Jobs 1955-2011
If you happen to live under a cemented rock and don’t know what today is, it’s EARTH day. I know all of you have heard of “being green everyday”, and still continue to spit your gum out on the side walk, or run your dishwasher with 10 million pots and one dish, stop being a lazy sloth and help save the planet!
Here are 3 little baby steps, that your beautiful self can do:
1. Those cute little reusable bags you bought at Forever21, USE them! leave them in your car so when you go shopping you can’t use the “Oh sorry I forgot them excuse” ( I do it all the time tsk tsk)
2.Unplug chargers. Even if you’re not using them they’re still electricity sucking creatures.
3. Put your trash, yes even that little baby-teeny wrapper, IN the trash.
Be happy.Be green <3
Every morning after wiping my eye stickies, I do two things–put on some chappy, and grab my phone. I check twitter for any zodiac facts, news, and funny one-liners. I live my life through my horoscope. If it says I’m going to have a good day, I will. If it says I should relax I do. It basically runs my life.
This specific one made me say “yes!” out loud. I do like myself more. And, ok, no one’s perfect (I know not even me) but no one likes to face and tackle their ugly side. So, take your time, do what you want, and one day all of your imperfections will be cleared by the zodiac gods (well almost all).
Be happy. Read your horoscope. Eat chocolate. Love.
” Be calm – love me – today – yesterday – what tearful longings for you – you – you – my life – my all – farewell. Oh continue to love me – never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved.Ever thine,
Ever mine,
Ever ours. “
… The Immortal Beloved Letters, Ludwig van Beethoven
From the time I first started wearing make-up in middle school for dance competitions and performances, I have hated makeup. It never stays on. It smears. It stains. It causes pimples. Its f gross.
To my misfortune I was not born with perfect skin, so I struggle every morning trying to look like a normal human. (Sorry but the you’re naturally pretty thing, just doesn’t cut it sometimes.)
I have tried everything from CVS foundation, Sephora, Clinique, and to some expensive brand I can’t spell or pronounce. None of the above have ever fulfilled their ‘cover up duty’. I would always find myself going to the bathroom during a break at school, looking at myself, and saying “damn sister, you need some help!”
This one liner reoccurs when I go out at night, and let the tequila in my system take over, causing me to sweat, which then of coarse leaves me with nothing but a sad ‘whatever I’m hammered excuse’.
ENTER MY NEW LIFE SAVIOR: MAC Pro long wear foundation
Thank you Jesus!
The heavenly substance stays on for hours!–days even, if you’re gross and you don’t wash it off. (ok whatever I forget to wash my face sometimes too) It’s basically waterproof! I bought a fluffy brush, so I only get a thing layer of it on–I’m anti-cake face.
Thank you MAC gods. You have answered my prayers.
Ok this is going to be my last rant about jewelery commercials. Promise.
During the holiday season jewelry stores and their marketing departments find it necessary to mess with my gag reflexes–not nice or romantic. I’m no Love hater either. I’m down with the romantic moments and of coarse a little bling. But please, spare those of us, who understand the fact that a dude would NOT be standing out in the snow, waiting for this girl to look out the window to show her a necklace.
and how about this one?
“I’m right here…and I will always be” WOW please don’t! and what is she jumping from? a little thunder? I mean I’m not gona lie, thunder scares me too, but I don’t automatically turn around and jump into the arms of Fabio. And sister let’s be real “Don’t let go…ever?” Sorry but did we not learn anything from Titanic?
Let’s hope they step it up for Valentine’s Day.
To all of you that might be interested in watching the videos I posted as blogs, well sorry but YouTube hates me. My videos are blocked, unwanted, or actually they’re “wanted” in other countries. Weird. I’m trying my best to get these issues fixed. Till then, save money for my YouTube account bail 
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California sun, beach, surfing, sand between your toes–the good life.
I have to admit my surfing abilities are very limited–very. But, the times I have been out there and tried it, you really forget about trying to be the next Kelly Slater and focus more on just being out in the ocean away from everything (in LA any getting away is needed sometimes). I will warn you guys, the water is always popsicle degrees–even when it’s summer, so use a wet suit! Hope you guys enjoy the video!
P.S. California beaches are much cleaner than in other parts of the country, but there is still a lot we can do to make sure we’re not out there swimming next to candy bar wrappers.
